What a 10-Year-Old at Trunk or Treat Taught Me About Confidence and Choices

If you’ve never been to a Trunk or Treat, it’s a church or community event where people decorate their car trunks, line them up in a parking lot, and hand out candy to kids who go from car to car in costume. It’s a fun, safe, and lighthearted way to celebrate Halloween.

At our church’s Trunk or Treat this year, my daughter-in-law decorated her car like a friendly monster — complete with eyes, teeth, and a big bowl of candy. She stood beside it, smiling and offering handfuls to every child who came by.

Then came one boy — maybe ten years old — who approached alone. He looked carefully over the candy choices, studying them like a kid on a mission. After a good thirty seconds of serious thought, he looked up and said,“Um… no thanks,” and walked away.

We all burst out laughing.

On one hand — ouch! Straight-up rejection. I mean, it’s candy, and he’s a kid. Pretty sick, unintentional burn.

But on the other hand — good for him.

Good for him for knowing what he wanted (or didn’t want) and not feeling pressured to take something just because it was expected. He didn’t owe anyone a polite “yes.” He simply honored his own decision, and that’s actually pretty impressive.

Of course, the practical side of me thought, He might not like that candy now, but what about the trading value later? I bet he knows someone who’d trade a mini Snickers for a Laffy Taffy any day!

Still, one simple story — so many lessons.

Sometimes we say “yes” when we mean “no,” just to be polite, to fit in, or to avoid disappointing someone. But every time we do that, we trade away a little bit of clarity, peace, and confidence in our own choices.

Knowing what you want — and having the courage to honor it — is a skill worth developing at any age.

So… where do you stand on this? Would you have taken the candy just to be nice, or walked away like the boy who knew what he wanted?

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